Choice

Life is about choice

Everyday we make choices that impact us. At times we are clear about our choices, at times we don’t see that we have a choice and there are times when we give away our choices to others. We don’t always realize what our choices may be. Even indecision is a choice.

Being at choice is developing aware ness of where we are in our lives – mindfully, emotionally and spiritually. Once we’re fully aware of where we are and that we want to be somewhere else, we open up to possibility. Possibility is about embracing play to see how far we truly want to go. Play involves creativity to open doors we never knew existed. Choiceful living is about going through the doors you most want.

Trying on Both…And!

The other day I was presenting to a group of business people and suggested that one way they could reduce the amount of energy they expend is to use “both and” rather than “either or” when working with others. It’s especially handy when trying to reach decisions as part of a team or partnership. By saying “both and” you recognize the value of the idea of another and make space for it to be considered. This reduces energy in that you’re being inclusive rather than exclusive and paves the way for people to feel valued and accepted.

The first time I came across this concept was about 15 years ago when I was working on leadership with a group of teachers, trying to have them be more creative in their approach to decision-making. I came across the work of Dr. Edward deBono’s on lateral thinking using his Six Thinking Hats model. This model promotes making decisions as they do in Eastern cultures rather than Western cultures. Eastern cultures value the opinions of others and include a variety of perspectives in the decision-making process, while Western cultures value one “right” decision – which in most organizations comes from the person with the greatest authority in the group.

I came back to this notion again when I began coaching as a technique used to value what is being said while bringing in an additional perspective. By saying that both or even multiple ideas are of value, we can bring a myriad of perspectives to a decision instead of ruling them all out (except for yours of course). Try on “both and” for a few days and see how it begins to open up greater possibilities!